Friday, October 25, 2013

the Flavor (TW:rape)

I don't know how to have sex.

I know how to be raped.
I know how to lay there and disassociate.
I know how to numb the body,
to not have any sensation.

I know how to fuck someone.
I know how to find that special place
my hands.
my mouth.
my tongue.
I know how to make someone's back arch.
and how to make moans come out of someone's mouth.

I know how to masturbate.
I know how to touch my body
just right.
when I am drunk.

But I don't know how to have sex.
I don't know how to let someone touch my body.
I don't know how to make love.
I don't even know how to be fucked.

I don't know
I have almost come to being 35
I still don't know
what it feels like
to enjoy the love from another person.

Once 20 years ago for a brief moment,
someone showed me this.
A taste of what love could be.

A flavor I want again in my mouth.

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