Thursday, April 7, 2011

Who cute down the Bodhi tree?

Whatever it was that I don’t remember. it must have been something. that haunts me into the morning hours through the never ending night.

I am so weak. Why am I so weak that I am such easy prey to snatch up and kill. The more I fight the more your desire to own me and make me submit to your glorious almighty power.

I am so strong. Can’t you see the lines around my eyes from years of trying to laugh away the pain. The scars and permanent deformities left from all the attempts to beat me into submission. And I still stand here, refusing your violence as your sly smirk; as you again refuse to acknowledge me as a human equal and of the same material as you.

I am loud. So loud I have no voice. only audible to our sonic eared friends who are ready to stand with me through a revolution.

I will give my life for you so I don’t have to live mine. So I can escape for the constant degradation and humiliation I endure. But I can not raise my voice against my aggressors because I have nothing to bargain with. I have nothing.

I am nothing.

I am an ant who wants to be the oceans. My ocean is across a fire ant colony.

My love is an amulet called my heart. I keep losing it or breaking it. Its been crushed a few times. I keep trying to fix it but it is looking a little worse for the ware or should I say wearer.

The world is like an oyster .that ate me up and is now digesting me in its saliva.

I am the kanji of a haiku. and no I won’t explain to you what this means.

My mother aborted me and my father got too drunk so I drown in the river. But seriously folks thanks for coming out tonight.

In your moment, you might think that you might know where I have come from but I can still feel the over-sized belt buckle cold on my skin and see the carefully placed cowboy hat as i am told how much I like it. I could care less what your snap judgments of me are. especially the ones you make based on what you think you see with your eye. you have never warn my shoes and you never will. If I had a penny for every time I was called a name in hate I would be a billionaire. You?

I am my flesh. my heart. my spirit. I am fire. I am Shiva and Vishnu and Kali. Ganesha leads my way. I am the Pheonix. self-actualization. revolution. catalyst. a monster. With big teeth and yellow eyes, I’ll eat you right up I will. Or we can build forts and both be king. and howl at the moon under the banyan tree. I am the first flower and the first seed.

I must be in hell piles of dead ladybugs and the maggots keep falling on my head. The land is barren the humans have poisoned it writing useless poetry on their computers while dying a slow painful death as we all turn into demoned demeaned monsters eating each other to survive. pollution mutilated. And you will say, who did this. The birds and the fish when they leave they will point at us, the ones who cut down the Bodhi tree.

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